So Thursday is storytime day for us at the local library. The library opens at 10:00am and Storytime begins at 10:15. We almost never make it on time, we almost always walk in 2-3 minutes late. (Even after 3 winters here I still haven't gotten down the whole buckling-a-car-seat-harness-over-a-winter-coat thing ....) Anyway, yesterday I was ON THE BALL! (even though I was up THREE times shuttling Allison out of Amy's bed and back into her own) I managed to workout-shower-get Audrey to her bus stop-load the dishwasher-and get us out the door and on our way to Storytime AHEAD of schedule. Yea me! We actually even got there early! We walked in to the "community room" at 10:05, thank you very much.
When we walked in, there was some man there conducting some sort of class. He had tables set up and people were filling out some sort of form and he had all sorts of papers stacked on the table where "Storytime Lady" has all her books. I thought to myself, "well that's odd that they would have something else going on in here for the scant 15 min before storytime but ... oh well ..... So the room starts filling up, the man asks what we are there for and we tell him Storytime is next, but no one clarifies to him that "next" means 10:15. But hey, I am just happy we are there early and I figure - maybe this is what I miss each Thursday....
But then - in walks "Storytime Lady" .... Now, let me preface this by saying that Storytime here borders on ridiculous. They have it broken down into several age categories and you have to register to even be allowed to come. The room is rather smallish so I can see wanting to control the size but .... they keep it pretty darn small. Then once you actually "get in", they take attendance and boot you out if you don't come! Yep, that's right, they take attendance at the FREE Storytime at the PUBLIC library. If you miss 3 times without calling and giving what they deem to be a good enough excuse, they remove you from the list and call some poor schlep on the waiting list. So anyway - now that you know how serious this Storytime is, understand that when "Storytime Lady" came in, we all kind of sucked in our breath and wacthed and waited to see what would take place.
My friends - it was HYSTERICAL! We're talking Thursday night sitcom hysterical. Think back to the ladies who read to you at the local library (unless of course you grew up in Austin where the library workers are all pretty "granola") This lady is the sweetest little grandma with one of those high pitched, sing songy voices that perpetually sounds like she is reading to 2 year olds. The man who had "invaded" our room was a tad on the heavy side and had been chatting with us as we waited so we knew he also had a side job as a stand up comic. So she starts telling him he shouldn't be in our room. He tells her he had it reserved, she shakes her head, puts on her "sad face" and tells him "no you didn't". He tells her yes he did, "no, you didn't". He tells her he received confirmation, "no you didn't". On and on this goes. You can tell he is dumbfounded. He can't get anywhere with this woman and her library lady, story telling voice is beginning to creep him out. I was creeped out and she wasn't even talking to me. You kind of got the impression she would be the type of sweet little old lady that would have the shrunken heads of parents who tried to sneak into storytime even when they weren't on the list in her basement (or something of that nature). The other adults that had been in the room filling out whatever form this man had were suddenly gone, I'm thinking they probably belly-crawled out the back door ..... Next thing you know grandma leaves and sends in some big wig - The Uber-Librarian if you will. He looks official with all sorts of badges and keys and he begins to sternly explain to this poor man that he should not be in our room. The poor guy, he has been trying to pack his stuff up all while this going on, there was obviously a breakdown in communication somewhere but he is being treated like he invaded a small defenseless 3rd world country .....
So eventually "order" is restored and we begin our storytime. .... It was by far one the most comical and at the same time surreal things I have ever witnessed. Man - I am so gettin' to Storytime early or on time form here on out!!!Who knew there was the potential for so much drama!
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