The Arrival of Andrew

So my little cherub will be 6 weeks old in just TWO DAYS and I am finally getting a chance to get back to the ol' blog and share the story of his birth.

But before I get in to his "birth story" perhaps I should back it up and look at this entire adventure.  It was definitely a lesson in learning to be flexible.

I can be a flexible person to a certain extent but ask those who know me best and they will surely tell you I am a person who thrives on routine and predictability.  Small changes I can handle with grace and dignity but when the big things are changed up on me, I tend to panic and act out in not so becoming ways.

With this pregnancy, God was apparently trying to beat this personality trait of mine into submission.

I had always wanted 4 kids but I was accepting that we were "done" and I was completely happy with my three girls.  I turned 40 and like so many women I started to focus on improving myself, physically, emotionally, spiritually .... I scaled back my volunteering at church so we could more actively participate in worship. I was hoping we could finally find a small group to join. I joined Weight Watchers and was slowly losing weight. I discovered Zumba and went to classes 2-3 times a week. I was working a part time online job.  I was volunteering more with AHG and looking forward to volunteering in the schools when Allison headed to Kindergarten.  For the first time I would not have a pre-schooler at home. I was looking forward to getting my "groove back" and even thinking of looking for work outside the home .....

BUT THEN

WHAM!

David learns that Ceva is closing their West Chester facility and two days later I get the first indication that a baby is on the way.  Over the next 2 months I slowly come to terms with everything.

Pregnant - at 40 - with a husband facing uncertainty in his job.... This is NOT how I do things .... This is NOT what I had planned for the Spring of 2011 and certainly not what I was looking at for 2012.....

Pregnant?  I can't be pregnant.  I have my babies in Austin, TX at Seton with Dr. Grogono delivering them.  Now you tell  me I have to have a baby in OHIO and I don't even know where I'll deliver or who the doctor will be?  Since I wasn't telling anyone I was pregnant yet, I looked for an OB online and settled on a group called Hilltop Obstetrics.  The lady on the phone seemed nice but ....

I picked them partially based on location BUT the West Chester office is only open two days a week and they share office space with a cancer treatment center.  I figure I can work around this but when I go to my first appointment I start to feel differently.  They share a really SMALL space with the cancer treatment center.  I lost my mom to cancer in 1995.  It was a long time before I could even set foot in a hospital again without major anxiety and now I have to pass by the room where the patients receiving chemo treatment are sitting in order to get to my exam room?  It was difficult to say the least.  When I am pregnant, my longing for my mother is at an all time high. Had David not been with me that first day and had there been a cancer patient receiving treatment at the time I think my blood pressure probably would have been sky high.

THEN - even though I stated at my initial appointment that I prefer to only see female OB's and even though the doctor we saw that day said this would not be a problem .... it became one.  And there were other things too - I opted for one pre-natal test, a neuchal translucency screening.  It is an early ultrasound to check for a Down's Syndrome marker. I simply wanted an early ultrasound.  They made a mess of the scheduling and I had to sit through a genetic counseling session which I DID NOT sign up for.  It was horrid listening to this stranger tell me all the ways my baby was at risk for one horrific defect after another. She made me feel so irresponsible for allowing myself to become pregnant when I was clearly overweight and 40. AND THEN I didn't even get my ultrasound - they hadn't scheduled it.  I finally go back for the ultrasound about a week later only to discover that baby is too "old" and too "big" for the test to be valid.  As a result, insurance decides not to cover the test and we end up paying for it out of pocket.

So I talk to friends, I find a new OB group - one that is all female and one that two women I am good friends with use.  I also find out that I get to deliver at a Catholic Hospital (YEA! Seton is a Catholic hospital - FINALLY a similarity!!). I also learn that this hospital houses the top neo-natal unit which is another similarity.  I am feeling better. But there are still drawbacks.  I need to try and see every doctor in the practice before I deliver and since I am coming in 17 weeks pregnant, I will not see the same doctor twice.  I also meet the doctor who will deliver my baby only ONE WEEK before my scheduled induction.

The pregnancy progresses with its ups and downs but nothing major.  I am sick to my stomach 24/7 but that was the case with my 1st and 3rd pregnancies as well.



Good Samaritan is about 30-40 minutes from our house
 - - - Seton was 7 minutes away when I delivered Audrey and maybe 15-20 minutes away when I delivered Amy and Allison.
Good Samaritan is not in the "best" part of town
- - - Seton is in a great part of town with wonderful shops and restaurants close by. People don't mind coming to visit you at Seton because they can also take care of a few errands before or after.
I like to have  burger and shake from Hillberts when I am in the hospital
- - - The closest I'm gonna get this time is a burger and a Frosty from Wendy's
I ended up sharing a room in the mother/child wing.
- - - No one I know has EVER had to share a room.  It was not fun.  Between all the fun stuff going on as my "nether regions" recover from delivery and the intricacies of getting my sweet newborn latched on and nursing, I tend to spend the first few hours after giving birth in a very semi-dressed state.  With a teen mom, her boyfriend, and their rotating gaggle of friends coming to visit, this was not an option.  We even had to share a bathroom for crying out loud!

And then Andrew and I came home.

No one has ever been there to help out when I have come home.  I have done it on my own and while I was always envious of the help my girlfriends got from their moms, I had learned how to navigate this life event on my own and I had my ... say it with me ... routine.  This time however, my mother-in-law came up from Austin to help out for a week.  And I am not saying I did not appreciate her help.  I honestly don't know what we would have done without her.  What I am saying is that I am a bit of an anal control freak and it was very hard for me to let go and let someone help.  For me, accepting help almost feels like admitting a weakness, even failure to a certain extent and I am not good at it.  To be forced into a situation where I had to accept help was definitely good for me but OH MAN was it hard to do.

But you know what? Even with all the changes and differences - I am still here and somewhere, deep down, I am probably a better person.

Now excuse me while I go off to do something "the way I always do it".  All this reminiscing about how different this pregnancy and delivery was has me feeling a little whirly-twirly .... :)